Last November I realized how tired I was of my grievance-filled relationship with Christmas. For many years, feelings of resentment, anger and despair would begin to surface around November 1, right about when Christmas music started playing as I stood in line at Starbucks for my short dark roast.
The approach of Christmas has been a cue for me to find ways of spending as much time as possible alone, away from the frantic activity and busy-ness, a mini-retreat from it all. Which would have been a wonderful experience, except that such a spiritual sounding idea was based on so much ill-will! I realized, with a sense of shock, that I had the option to participate in the season, and to enjoy every moment of it, the same as every other day of the year. This was welcome but it left me with a large gap.
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