"Anger ... it's a paralyzing emotion ... you can't get anything done. People sort of think it's an interesting, passionate, and igniting feeling — I don't think it's any of that — it's helpless ... it's absence of control — and I need all of my skills, all of the control, all of my powers ... and anger doesn't provide any of that — I have no use for it whatsoever." ~ Toni Morrison
For decades anger was my constant companion. I was angry at everyone and everything. The strange thing is that it gave me a false sense of strength. My anger was always justified, righteous. Then, when I began my forgiveness work, I realized that anger was nothing more than a sad attempt to create some illusion of power. I chose anger as a response to a belief that I had no power or worth. Worse, I realized that I was severely addicted. I was addicted to the FEELINGS associated with anger. It had absolutely nothing to do with ‘reasons’, it was an addiction. Now, years after detoxing, I still have momentary flares of anger but they are rare and quickly intercepted. Piece of cake...
Diederik Wolsak is program director at Choose Again